My Life as an Onion

Journey through Bikram Yoga By Karen Carnow

I have spent many years as a Vinyasa yogini, but due to injuries, my practice needed a change.  My friend, Amy, asked me to join her at Bikram, and I did; sporting a very negative attitude.  That particular class did not make me very happy.  The heat was gross, people were wearing bizarre outfits, the poses were boring, I wanted to leave early.  Where was the music, and the flow, and people doing cosmic headstands and arm balances?  What was this? And the worst part, the instructor wanted me to look in the mirror.  She must have been  kidding; for I had not really looked into a mirror in years.  All the yoga I had done previously,  was in a very dark room, preferably with my eyes closed.

But, understanding that I needed yoga in my life, I decided to go again the next day.  I hated that day even more. So hot, so uncomfortable, and no; I am not looking in the mirror.  As that morning wore on, I was amazed at how good I actually felt.  This could be an interesting concept; yoga without pain and competition.   “Fine,” I said to myself agreeing to give Bikram one more chance.

On this third day, an epiphany hit me. I decided  as I “glanced” up, that perhaps the reason I don’t want to look at myself was something very deep and very repressed.  So in final Savasana, I became an “Onion" determined to peel away some of my layers, to find some inner core.

The first layer I needed to attack was my night food binges.  Maybe if I curbed that, I could wake up feeling lighter and less angry. Done.  Layer magically peeled.

The second layer was to change my eating habits, and to replace bad carbohydrates with good ones.  Oh, snickers…how you will be missed.  Layer peeling.

The third layer would be the toughest and would be a work in progress; liking myself  again. Being patient with myself, and knowing that at 56 years old I am doing “pretty darn great.”

I am proud to tell you that I have been doing Bikram almost every day for 8 weeks, and I stopped my abusive food habits. The evolution has been transforming and my onion skins are really starting  to peel away. I am finding self acceptance, and a desire to peel away more layers to find the core with in.

I am amazed that the teachers all guide with a  scripted instruction; and how uniquely different they all are.  Sometimes, I feel like a pretzel, sometimes superman, and sometimes a tin man; it's always different.  Every day. Every instructor.   But, I am finding,  that it is all good.  And that I want more.  And to feel more.  And to peel more.

My goal is to stand in front, wear a cute skimpy outfit, and look in the mirror.  Really look.  And then, I will finally be at the base of my onion.

Call to Action

 By H. J. Klingman Most of us do more to care for our automobiles than our bodies.  Would you put sugar in your gas tank? Of course not! But we’ll put sugar in our body’s “tank” day in and day out, though it can not process it as effectively as other fuels. Would you drive for miles on a flat tire and let your wheel rim grind into the ground? NO! But we'll let a persistent pain or injury in the body go untreated for years before taking action?

Taking action to participate in maintaining our health is not a luxury or a burden; it is our duty, a call to action, our Karma Yoga. Karma yoga is our duty to care for our bodies and our health. Bikram reminds us constantly of the importance of caring for YOUR LIFE. Nobody else can take care of your life for you, it is your own effort required to fulfill this aspect of your Karma Yoga.

The word “Karma” translates literally to “action”.  When we begin to practice the physical, or “Hatha” yoga, we are taking action by caring for our bodies, fulfilling our Karma by doing our duty. Taking action to keep your body and mind healthy and functioning, allows you to perform the other kinds of yoga in your life.  Both actions and the results of those actions are Karma. According to Bikram , “Karma Yoga is number one; nothing is more important in your life, in my life or in this world than fulfilling your duty. This is what maintains balance and harmony in the universe.”

By practicing Hatha Yoga (the physical aspect of yoga) and Raja Yoga (the mental aspect of yoga), we prepare the body for Karma Yoga.  When we practice Hatha Yoga we can discover where our Karma lies, and how to carry out our life’s mission. So, if ever you are feeling lost or without direction, all you need to do is roll out your yoga mat and begin practicing Asana (postures) and Pranayama (breath control). When you care for your mind and body your mission will come to you. Through patience, practice, and persistence you can begin to perform your Karma Yoga and fulfill your life’s mission one posture at a time.

Ditching Your ‘Yoga Drama’

By P.J. Stuart

It’s not what you think. But it’s real. And it’s hurting you.

No, this is not Junior High School, and there are no stories after class about who-pushed-whom out of Standing Bow pose. There’s no gossip in the locker room over how poorly someone dressed for class that day; and we’re more than likely to thank the teachers who “picked on us” during class rather than harbor grudges toward them afterwards.

This is a different kind of drama.

The 90 minutes we spend sweating through 26 postures, time after time, can be grueling. Physically as well as mentally, we are pushed to our limits and learn to operate well outside our comfort zone. Some days, the heat and the intensity are so taxing we can hardly bear it. We think we might rather die than persevere.   And yet, in bona fide test of character, we go on.

Here’s where the Yoga Drama kicks in.

For me, on an especially dehydrated or overly-tired kind of day, it usually hits me right around the time of Poorna-Salabhasana (aka Full Locust Pose – “the 747 taking off”).  Substitute whichever posture you prefer, the internal dialogue leading up to Yoga Drama usually goes a little something like this:

Oh no. Not this one. I hate this one. Shouldn’t class be over by now?  Seriously it’s awful today. The room is like 1,000 degrees hotter than usual. I don’t think I can do it. Maybe I should just keep my head on the floor and sit this one out. Ugh. Here goes nothing. Hands up. Legs up. Higher. Higher. Seriously?? Are you #%@& kidding me?? How long are they forcing me to hold this one today. I can’t breathe … this hurts … I’m dying!

And then it happens.  As you release yourself from the posture, it comes out …

“UGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH………..sigggggggggggghhhhhhhh…………”

The loudest, most deflating sound effect a human can make as they exhale. That’s Yoga Drama.

Maybe sometimes we have the desire to surrender to our own struggles. Or sometimes, we’re just so desperate to let others know we are suffering. Maybe we want the teacher to hear it, as if to say, “Hey! Quit pushing me so hard.”

How it Hurts:

Fair enough.  But Yoga Drama creates a real handicap, not only for you but also for your fellow yogi classmates and the overall energy of the room.

By affirming your inner pain and discomfort in such an extroverted manner, you are giving power to the nasty voices inside your head that say “I can’t.” It pushes you further away from your own strength.  Underlining your discomfort in such a fashion makes it more tangible, adding negative momentum to what is already a punishing battle of the spirit.

Furthermore, once your inner pain is externalized, it moves into the space between you and your neighbors. It serves as an audible reminder to everyone near you of how tough this practice really gets.  Anyone else struggling to keep up may be susceptible to your moans and decide to start commiserating with you.  Suddenly, the whole class is in rough shape.  (Ok - now I’m being dramatic, I know).

“My biggest concern when I hear the gasps is that it signals the student is probably holding their breath,” says BYPV teacher Mark Trinitapoli.

How to Let it Go:

Just as negative emotion is contagious, so is positive emotion.

1.  Look around you at the amazing will power of those you share the room with. People of all ages and backgrounds are sweating through the yoga with you, enduring their own inner battles of mind over matter. Let them serve as an inspiration to propel you forward with greater strength. Together we thrive.
2.  Give yourself credit for being in the room and don’t be upset or discouraged.  Fight the good fight. Take rest where you need to.
3. Remember, the pain and discomforts you experience are temporary, fleeting feelings. Best of all, they can be vanquished with the simple power of your own deep, steady breathing. (As in Bikram Yoga, as in life itself!)

From one “Yoga Drama victim” to another,

Namaste my friends!

HORSEY RIDES IN 365 DAYS!

By Todd Deacon Low back pain is one of the most common problems people have. According to a study from the College of Maryland, about 60% of the adult U.S. population has low back pain, and it is the second most common reason people go to the doctor. Low back problems affect the spine's flexibility, stability, and strength, which can cause severe pain, discomfort, and stiffness. Back pain is the leading cause of disability in Americans under 45 years old. Each year 13 million people go to the doctor for chronic back pain. The condition leaves about 2.4 million Americans chronically disabled and another 2.4 million temporarily disabled.

I am fortunate enough not to be disabled, but I have had a very bad back injury for over 16 years. I’ve seen specialists, physical therapists, personal trainers, masseuses, and even a stretching specialist. You name it, I’ve tried it.  Just over a year ago things had gotten very bad, I was having episode after episode were I couldn’t get off the floor for sometimes up to 5 days. It was really starting to affect my life. I have an amazing and wonderful wife and two beautiful daughters who count on me. I wasn’t able to work, play with my kids, or help out. I was in pain and miserable.

My doctor recommended physical therapy. I’m self-employed and pay hundreds a month for adequate insurance coverage. However, I was informed that physical therapy would not be covered by insurance and I would be paying around a hundred dollars per visit! Wow, no thanks! Instead I RICE’d it (rest, ice, compress, and elevate), sat in the hot tub, stretched, and took anti-inflammatories; all the typical western solutions. The pain would eventually subside, but it just kept coming back. I finally listened to my sister and did something different…

My sister, Nicole, owns Bikram Yoga Paradise Valley (BYPV). She kept telling me a regular practice of Bikram Yoga would help my back. I had practiced sporadically in the past, but never made a commitment to the yoga.  Plus it’s really hard and you sweat your face off!

I committed to practicing 3-4 times minimum per week for a year.  In the begining there were times when I wasn’t sure if it was getting better, but with continued communication with the gurus at BYPV I learned how to heal my body.  For example, I learned that backward bending would help heal my back more than forward bending, though the forward bending felt good on my lower back. There was so much to learn and unlearn, I am so thankful for all the amazing guidance I receive at BYPV.

Low and behold, a year later I couldn’t be happier about my decision and I’m even happier I fulfilled my commitment. Though my back isn’t 100% and I still have days when it’s tight, it’s 99% better and that’s saying A LOT! I haven’t lost a day to laying on the floor because my back is in spasms. Did I mention I’ve lost some weight? In the last year I also lost 40 pounds doing Bikram Yoga, drinking LOTS of water, and eating healthier.

When asked why I do Bikram Yoga?  Other than being pain-free, feeling like a million bucks every time I do the yoga, being strong and healthy, and finding self-realization... the number one reason is being able to give my three and five year old daughters horsey rides before bed.

What is the Most Important Thing in Your Life?

By Terri Villavaso Seemingly, the good answers to this question are endless….

Well Bikram reminds us, the ONLY answer is in the question…

YOUR LIFE.

My whole adult life I have been mindful to stay fit, and take care of me.  I enjoy running, hiking, cycling used to be big on the list, going to the gym, etc.

In 2004, I had no idea what a yoga class might entail… Union of mind and body, what does that mean? 90 minutes in a HOT room?  Of course, I questioned WHY so long... Do everything twice?  One time should surely be enough? WHAT DOES BREATHING MEAN?

My husband, Guy, started yoga a long time before me.  I had zero interest in going.  Of course I was capable of doing my own thing, and did not need a structured HOT class.  I had so many opinions about it all.  I thought for a long time, people were just sitting around in a room meditating, and there was no work out happening…

So our kids, Evan, Tyler, and Emily, were about 12 and 13 years old and they went to a class before I did with Guy!  THAT, is what got ME to my first class…  hearing them say, "MOM, YOU HAVE TO TRY THIS….  YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE IT... YOU LOVE CHALLENGES."

My first class felt like it lasted about 3 hours… time dragging, no clock, I was in shock, most inflexible person in a room of about 45, some crazy teacher calling me… “hey you, in the red shorts”…

I was literally mad at every person in that yoga room, most especially at my husband for not telling me how it REALLY was going to be.  All these so-called, YOGIS, focused only on their face in the mirror, not even noticing or caring that I was about to puke or pass out!

I could not talk for about 2 hours after class, and sat on the corner of my couch at home wrapped in a towel, unable to move or think.  All kinds of things racing in my head, and I could not get the vision of this pretty chick on the front row doing a beautiful “standing bow pulling pose” out of my head!  How dare her show me up, surely I can learn how to do that???

My family still laughs that I was the most unlikely person to ever go back for a 2^nd class or next, or next, or to out of the blue, in 2007 announce to them, I want to be a teacher!!!!

It was not easy the whole process.  Bikram always says, THE RIGHT WAY IS THE HARD WAY, AND IT’S UP TO YOU TO MAKE IT WORK.

I started noticing right away the effects of the yoga.  I felt more patient, more disciplined with my diet, more tuned in to the inner person in me… the observer.  I started feeling different from the inside of me, deep down.  At the top of the list was something very big- my whole family became much more connected.

Somewhere between classes 8 to 10, I thought I might decide that this practice is for ME.  We all know that moment… the one when you walk out of the studio and you have MORE ENERGY, compared to feeling you have to go home and rest!

I got on a routine pretty quickly and decided more is better!  I have kept it up for a long time.  Following a senior teacher seminar back in 2007, I got all energized and just could not stop thinking about it all.  Craig Villani led the seminar at our studio, and he had such a strong presence and so much warmth and knowledge, and I just knew in my heart that teaching was calling my name!  I could not stay off the Bikram website, and started waking up in the middle of the night, wondering, WHY IS THIS CALLING MY NAME?

I feel blessed I followed my heart.  I have been teaching for 5 years now, and it just keeps getting better.  I learn from watching the students, I keep growing on a daily basis.  The yoga does not change, I enjoy the way I keep changing and I see the way YOU keep changing!

NAMASTE, SEE YOU ON THE MAT.

TERRI